Ok I have a question for the lads of the forum who have internet dated or online dated, or whatever the hell you want to call it....
I have a slightly older girlfriend who is divorced, no kids.
She started chatting to a guy from an online dating site wayyyyyyyyyy back in December last year. He's "allegedly" fairly wealthy, owns many business's and incredibly busy. Due to lots of national and international travel, they've never met and only ever spoken on the phone twice. But they talk daily via email and sometimes a messenger program too (not sure if it's msn or facebook or something else, never asked)
Anywho....she talks about him ALL the time. And on Sunday by the river as we drank ourselves into oblivion she said that during their many months of discussion he confided to her that he lost his wife and small daughter in a car accident 6 years ago and whilst he thought he was ready for a relationship, time has shown him, that perhaps he's not. He's created a very busy life for himself and did so after his wife and daughter were killed (apparently) and as he feels SHE is looking for love, or a relationship, he doesn't want to meet her, but would like to continue talking via email as he now considers her a friend.
WTF is this shit????
Is this even remotely plausible???
I personally told her I think he's full of shit and she needs to cut the mofo off. If after 8 or 9 months of talking almost every day, he can't muster up the courage and/or desire to fucking well meet her - then he's hiding something.
She has apparently exchanged MANY photo's with him (of herself) and he's always said he's very attracted to her and she's beautiful (which she is) - and I believe he sent her about 5 pictures in the very beginning of their 'chats' but has refused to send more pictures since then!
Also, not too long after they started talking, he removed his profile from the site entirely, so he hasn't been 'actively searching' for a relationship/sex or friendship since that time (as far as she knows).
I guess my problem with this is, if you've spent 8-9 months 'talking' to eachother via email, why the hell shouldn't you meet? If only as friends? To share a coffee? Or a cheeky wine? Or...whatever!
She was distraught on Sunday and really, beyond telling her to cut him off and he's full of shit, I didn't know what else to say? My experience with online dating has been brief - and I literally exchanged maybe 3 or 4 messages with the men, before meeting them within a week or the first email. So I don't get it.
And I don't understand how you could invest that kinda time in someone who's not prepared to meet???????
Also....they allegedly live less than 5 minutes away from eachother?
Really! WTF?
Gents??? What is your take on this??
Is he a liar?
Is he hiding something?
Is he just not attracted to her?
Or wtf is going on here? lol
She's called him out and gotten angry with him, so she says and asked him if he's lied about everything and told him she doesn't even care anymore, would still like to at least lay eyes on him.
His response?
I've been through alot and whilst I thought I was ready for more, I'm just not. I'm sorry.
So errr.....I don't even know what to say to her anymore lol
Thoughts? Responses? Advice?
Also, she's 38 and cuuuuuuuuuuuuuuute! This woman has NO trouble meeting men in real life, but given all the time she's invested in this guy, I have a feeling she's built him up to be the ultimate or something far grander than what he actually is?
An intelligent beautiful woman has lost her fucking mind imo.
HELP!